I should have learned this lesson a long time ago, and it seems to be something I need to keep telling myself: my mental health is more important than my hobby.
Maybe, let's roll this back a-ways.
A few years ago, I had a mental break. Some very bad, life changing things occurred and I lost someone dear to me. That loss affected me very badly, creating a whirlwind of changes and still, to this day, affects me. I lost a lot of my personality in a short amount of time, and I've been slowly building it back. However, my time management skills are shot, and I have a tendency to put myself in the same positions again and again; I take on too much, can't finish, and then break.
It's been getting worse and worse as projects and years have gone on. I put too much stress on myself, and then end up beating myself up for not being able to achieve the endless things I set out for myself. It leads to self loathing, loss of sleep, poor diet, and then compounds. It gets to the point where I will mess up something small, and it will be as though the world should end with my mistake.
This is not the beginning of some attention grabbing self-assault. In fact, what I would rather talk about is the better that can be done; not only for me, but for everyone else. Things maybe you should hear from someone who knows and has felt it. These are not only things for cosplay, but relate to daily life too.
You don't have to achieve everything.
It may feel like you have to do everything you set yourself out to do, but taking things slow, breaking things into chunks, and getting help. Seeking help does not mean you're weak. Passing on things does not mean you're weak. You are allowed to say no, and you are allowed to change your mind.
Sleeping, eating, and taking care of yourself should come first.
Sometimes we lose track of time and forget to do some basic things. You are working on something and then all of a sudden you look up, and BAM, somehow it is half past one in the morning. You forgot to do the dishes, and you don't have a lot of clean clothes left, but hey, you managed to get done what you needed to. Or at least you made a dent in that thing. But when this is a constant, there is a problem. Sometimes you need to let go to do the most basic of things like shower, or sleep at a time that other human beings do. Please take care of yourself. Take a shower. Eat good food. Go to sleep. You are more important than your project.
You don't owe anyone anything.
Expectations can be rough, and when you self impose expectations on yourself, it has a tendency to get far rougher. Take a step back and start organizing things into a few categories: things you have to do, things you can do, and things that can take a back seat. This is going to be tough, because everything will look important and you will want to do it all. You don't have to do everything, it doesn't all have to be perfect, you are never obligated to say yes.
Your feelings are real, and valid.
Regardless of whether they are good or bad, whatever you feel is real and valid. You don't need to explain why you need a chance to cry. You are allowed to do what you need to to make you happy, or even just less crappy for a few minutes. If it means going for a walk, do it. If it means writing a letter and ripping it up, do it. If it means watching cat videos for a few hours, do it. Whatever you feel, it is a legitimate emotion. It is real.
You have a support system.
There are people around you willing to help you. There are people who are willing to listen to what you may consider the smallest of problems. There are people who will be there for you if given a chance. And if for some reason you feel as though everyone has abandoned you, you may not even know those most willing to help you. Even if it is the middle of the night, there are 24 hour help lines designed to respond to you. No matter how big or how small, there are people who want to help. There are no one-size-fits-all solutions to what you are going through, but there are those who can help you find a path; even if it's only a single stepping stone.
You are you, and you are loved.
There is no right way to do anything. However you need to do things may be right for you. But no matter how hard things get, please always remember that you are important and you are loved. You are never alone. There are people in this world who care about you. You are not alone.
This is by no means a primer on how to run your life, fix your problems, or bring about change. But these are things that I find that I need to hear in my darkest moments. I have to continually remind myself of these things, and I have wonderful people who encourage and keep me safe, regardless of how I mess myself up time and again. But for those of you that don't have those people nearby or who can't help you on a daily basis, please know that you are amazing, loved, and you are important. I believe in you.
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